just for laughs

stress ah

2011-07-19T00:27:00.001+08:00

STRESS AH!!! BALL SACK!!!

An extremely lazy Sunday

2011-07-10T17:56:00.002+08:00

Sunday, a day of sabbath. I didn't go to church today again. As much as i want to go, i couldn't/didn't. Been feeling all lazy, dry and empty somehow about going to church. Today has been a really lazy day for myself. I couldn't even study. I told my Renee that i would be studying the whole of today but when i opened my book this afternoon after skyping with her, i started zoning out. I felt so restless. I really hate this feeling. Why can't i just sit my ass down and read my book? I wasted 6 hours of my afternoon just starring at the ceiling, watching a movie which was so god damn boring, on the internet. The next thing i know, it's 6pm.The day is gone. Got a text from the Homies to meet up for dinner later at sunshine plaza at 7pm. They will be discussing the upcoming trip to Thailand coming October.

I realized something lately. Seems like Bangkok is really some nasty bad ass place. I have never been there in my life before. Read on wiki that sex and prostitution is the main source of income that drives up the nation's GDP and economy. Thai pubs and clubs are the places where all these 'happenings' happens. As much as there are all these, the gang rate is on a high. Illegal arms deal, circulation of drugs and women, massive child prostitution rings, transexuals and what not. Is there anything good? Like shopping, good food, sceneries, ancient buildings, king's temple, market on a river, unusual gifts? I may be going there this October but definitely, it's not for the 'wild'. I am someone who do not engage myself in prostitution, drugs and arms for sure. Once in awhile, taking in a little whiskey will do and a little interaction time with the guys. But not to the extent of doing stupid stuffs that will have alot of repercussions. That being said, i am sure Thailand has alot of cultural, historic shit for me to do. As much as the night scene is worth the eye opener, i bet the day will be much of a better deal. What i am looking forward to the most is the Tom Yum soup and shopping and of course, the scenes. Not a wild dude here not the party type, and definitely not a woman/sex hunter, am just a guy armed with a DSLR wanting to expand my photo albums!

Homies/Hombres:

A group name given by Rufford. Some may call themselves the guild, brothers or whatever. I think Homies sounds nicer. Like some Espanyol, Mexican, Latino Gangsta shit. Anyway, who are in the Homies? Ruff, PT, Boon, MK, Reez, Me, Alvin. Just some name. We were once running as the Jackass Union where we use to recruit pple to join in and pull stupid stunts together. I was the video man/ Stunt man. Ruff was kinda like the ring leader. Lol. Those were the days.

So.. I bring a close to my really lazy Sunday. I really could have done alot of catching up on my Statutory Interpretations and Judiciary Precedence.. But i missed it. Oh well, time to head down to meet the guys for dinner.

:)

Back

2011-07-09T22:25:00.002+08:00

Hi All. I know. The blog has been dead for really long. Tell me about it. Been lazy. Even forgotten that my blog existed! Anyway, shall start blogging again..

I know some people read this mundane blog to update themselves about my life and what i have been doing so far. Some, are just curious, some are just... Kaypohs

So.. Just an update about my life.. As of 2011

- Got into UOL Law programme early this year.
- Finally graduated from PSB Academy.
- Finally went to America, NY and Boston
- Happily attached to my girlfriend Renee Ong :)

Life for me nowadays haven't really been looking very positive. I admit, sometimes when people ask about how i am, i always reply with a smile and a 'I'm great'!. Well, sad to say, that smile, sometimes, is just a mask. Since young, i've been known for that. Why am i feeling so empty, lonely, tired, disheartened and what not at times? I sometimes wonder too.

Let's start with my Church life:

Sad to say, i haven't been attending church very regularly now. Since young, i know people have been talking behind my back. I don't usually give a damn about these things when i was much younger. Always live by this motto, 'It doesn't matter what people say about you, you are who you are and nothing can change that, they are just jealous'. Well, true, but the only difference now is i give a shit on who talks behind me and have been talking behind me. See, the church i attend, people leave more then people come in. From what i have observed. People whom i have known since young has left and attended other churches, some even to the extent of loosing their faith or converting even. One thing i know for sure, I know who Jesus is and i know that he exists in my life. Time and time again, i have been hurt by the comments people make about me. Or rather, they pass down judgements which are not true or just hearsay. Still, i endured and stay on. Till it got to a point in time where i really couldn't take it.

See, it seems like in the church, everyone is like a goodie two shoe. They act like a different person when in church. I wouldn't say that i don't but i try to stay as true to myself where ever i go. Take for instance my latest suspension from ministry. I know that i made a mistake by reacting in a very nasty manner. Well, at least i was just being me. Whereas for the other party, acts like he's some high and mighty leader, all holy and shit. But when it comes to the suspensions and what not, well, guess what. Your bet is right. Who gets shot in the nuts? Wan Marvin Marc-Arion. And the other dude, i don't know what he got but it's definitely not what i got. And here comes the stupidest part of all. NOBODY CONSIDERED THE BASIS TO WHY I EVEN REACTED THAT WAY! When i do something or say something, old cases from the past about me will suddenly spring up and cloud the minds of the pastors and leaders thus, judgement is passed down and BOOM Its my fault..

I really love the church and going. i kno nothing i do or say actually MATTERS to them cause then again, i'm just another scum of the earth, douche, jackass, motherfucker, or whatever in their eyes. I really hate naming people and pointing fingers at them. But hey, this is reality. Its still a dog eat dog world out there.

Now your know the reason i hesitate coming to church on Sundays.. How far can your actually put on that front i wonder?

School:
School's been really... Tough, Stressful, Tiring, A little exciting sometimes.. But how awesome can school be? Well, Sometimes it is. Been reading the law for coming about 7 months now. It's really something new. I don't get to see much statistical shit, or formulas. Which is somehow good. Worst part is.. The memorizing. It's really something. The vast amount of case laws, statutory laws and all can really take up your time. In fact, i already made a decision on giving up my social life and just focus and put my energy into this course. Well, be a nerd for 3 years and enjoy like a king for the rest of my life. So why not right. Good things comes from hard work and sacrifices.

The course will be for 3 years and then i'll be a fully certified lawyer. Then after i'll be continuing with my Masters/Bar for about another year or so. Can't practice in Singapore but hey.. who said the criminal lawyers make the biggest dough? And who said NUS or SMU lawyers are the best in Sg? Nobody actually looks at the private schools because... People stereotype us. Private Sch = Useless.

Girlfriend
Renee Ong, I think most of you readers know who she is. For those who don't, Renee is the girl whom i know existed in my secondary school. Someone who my good friend fancies and someone who i never spoken a word with. Lol. Someone who i really never thought i will end up with. HAHA! Things have been really sweet and awesome. She's studying at Berklee College of Music, the place where it's every musician's dream of being at. What can i say, she really is a very talented individual. Not only does she knows how to play music and all, but she is someone who knows how to be a housemaker. That is what makes her different from other girls of today. She possess the talents which every man is looking for in a wife and thank God he path a way for me. Since she left for the US last Dec, i admit that i've been rather lonely at times. The difference in a Long Distance relationship 10 years ago and now is the technology which we have. The internet is really a wonderful thing which many of us abuse. Shan't go into that. Recently, i went over to the US to pay her a visit. Absence really makes the heart fonder. Nowadays we see relationship come and go but this is one which is as solid as a rock even though we are divided by time and distance. This girl is someone whom i really want to wake up with in the morning in future. Enough said, it's our private life :)

As i mentioned earlier, lately, i've just been studying studying and studying. If time permits, i'll be lanning. Yea, so much of a use to be scene kid (like how Boon puts it). Well, those were things of the past. We have to move on some time in our lives. Nothing last or stays forever.

Peace out :)

A moment of Folly

2010-05-13T19:32:00.003+08:00

A moment of folly could cause a ripple effect. A moment of folly could end something drastically. You can end up Rich in A moment of folly.

Mood today: Not Fabulous

How can it be great? My girlfriend's ignoring me. Maybe she even told me a lie..

Work wasn't that bad as it was air conditioned

A moment of folly. I knew about the nigerian scams. 4-9-1. I read up the federal files on precautions to take. Whatever precautions there was or is, somehow, i chose to ignore it. This feeling.. This.... Voice in me said, just go ahead. So despite all the precautions and advices i had, i made the first transfer, 2nd and subsequently, the 3rd. All that on the line for 300k to start up my biz... now, is that worth it. I have been making calls to Nigeria, sending SMS and emails. Mrs Anita, the loaner, replies promptly. But the money isn't in. POSB said it will take 3-4 working days. So i shall wait....

i hope this decision i made in a moment of folly will be a good one...

Me...

2010-05-11T17:29:00.003+08:00

My Name is Marc and i'm working as a Project Executive at T.K.H Deco Pte Ltd. Basically, i'm a specialist in Road closing for huge sporting events in Singapore. Work is really taking a toll on me. I've never worked this hard before and i seriously cannot believe that i am doing so. If business is really good for the company, there i will go missing from places. It even require me to work on a Sunday. So what days do i have left? If there was a day in between Sun and Mon, i guess work needs me as well..

Damn..!

I've got big dreams. Really big ones. I'm a person who dreams big. I really want to achieve those dreams. Being my own boss and being able to provide for my whole family. I'm meaning both my parents too. I don't really care much about big houses and cars cause if they come, they come.

I've gone through alot of turns in life. Right now, i'm trying to straighten out my road again and walk. Sometimes i make really bad decisions but thank God, People around me always help me up. I turn bad decisions into good ones, i have the ability to influence. I am very charismatic.

Damn..!

I dont even know why i'm creating this entry.. whatever it is, MY BLOG'S BACK!

2010-04-17T19:41:00.002+08:00

APRIL,
4 months past, it's been almost 4 months since i've completer my national service.

Some may ask or wonde
r,

'what's Marc been up to nowadays?'
'why has he been dissappearing suddenly?'
'why the meeting or meetups are always cancelled or postponed at the 11 th hour?'

Firts of all, i would like to apologize to all my homies out there. We use to always say, bros before hoes. I never really feel what it was like having a real relationship where both pple are so soaked into each other's prescence they just forget abt the world around them.

I met a girl and her name is Renee Ong. I fell head over heels for her that i know not where my head is. She's marvellous, gorgeous, kind, cute and nice. I would use all vocabs in e dictionary to describe her but i cant cause she is way beyond that. I'm so glad that God sent her into my life. And yes, i must say, she impacted my life. I was a person who didnt bother abt the details but now, i'm am. I was a laid back dude wasting his youth but till i met her, i changed. She's my pillar of strength, my motivation, she's everything. She completes me. And like what Jerry Maguire said,
'she had me at Hello.'

Homies, if u met a girl like that, i'm sure you'll wanna spend ur every second with her. Cause its worth it.
This is 1 reason why i disappear every now and then from gatherings too.

After i got the news last afternoon, my eyes opened up. Matt's father passed on. It made me realised 1 thing which is the value of life and relationships. Many a time, we take things and pple around us for granted. It always seem that when we need help we think that these pple will be there. Matt's father is a good example. For all these years i knew him and his family . His dad was a really nice dude. What i noticed most was his willingness and his constant availability to always make it a point to be there for his family. Matt and family, dont worry for he is with the Lord. Be strong and walk always in e ways od God.

This applies to me. Alot. Many times, when i'm down, i realised all my personal friends will be there. Or at least try.. I just want ur to know that i appreciate ur and i love u guys.

How is Marc??
Mood: emotionally and physically worked out.

These past 3 days hasnt really been the best. Things arent the way it is or use to be. I try getting myself busy with work but when the flow stops, its her that i think of. 1 thing i still dont quite understand. Her mood. Till now, i wonder why she's giving me e cold shoulders. Was it something i said or do which i wasnt aware of? I wish i had e answers. Maybe there shd be a book on this. Nothing serious happened. We're still loving each other. Just that, i havent got to see her. And yesterday was one of that rare time which i lost my cool. Didnt get violent or did anything extreme. I just was really sarcastic cause sometimes i feel that i wasnt respcected for or taken advantage of. Then again, i really and truelly love her. Help me someone...

LangkawiN

2010-02-01T03:42:00.001+08:00

Alright, Done with ARMY! Time to travel again! This time, No need to apply leave or whatsoever. JUST GO ONLY! Lol.. I'll upload some pics if i can. Stay tuned!

Hello 2010

2010-01-01T04:34:00.002+08:00

Here we go! It's a New Chapter again. Wonder how 2010 will be like. I know 1 thing for sure which is... I ORD IN JAN!!! WHOO!! Another Transition again. Awesome! 2009 was a pretty fruitful year. Accomplished a few stuffs. This year, i hope to do much more.

BLOG LATER!! TIRED!

THuRSday..

2009-12-10T02:34:00.003+08:00

Hi all! Kind of in the mood for blogging so here's an entry

It's almost a week since Renee and her family left for Europe. Been spending most of my days and time alone and catching up with some homies. It's good and bad at the same time. Exams today and this coming Fri. Totally unprepared for Friday one. Worst of all, I dont even have notes for it. Sigh.....

Haven't really been regular at service. Within the last couple of months, alot of changes has been happening in my life. Army, Family etc. Been Really Tired most of the time thus affecting my discipline. Then again, i dont have much of discipline which i really wanna work on. Trying, trying.

It's a Thursday today. Next few days gonna be boring and all. Same o same o. Wanna go port dickson with my malay homies during the weekend but am contemplating. Saturday's kinda filled.

I'm gonna swim now!! HAAH!! it's Coming 3am. Hope the guards here aren't doing their routine checks!

PEACE OUT!

Renee's new hairdo..

2009-12-09T00:22:00.003+08:00

Here's her new hairdo. Actually, quite awhile already la. Lol.. Admire her bravery to chop off the hair.

Before:

After:

Renee after her super long sleep

2009-12-08T23:09:00.003+08:00

Argh! Where are u!

2009-11-04T03:41:00.004+08:00

Sitting out here in my Garden/Balcony. Never seen so many stars in the sky here before. The moonlight is exceptionally bright! Just so Beautiful.. Renee Would love the view i'm getting now. The wind is also power! Lol. But she's having better weather in Europe. Haha. Lucky Her.

My Exams are just 2 days away and i really can't focus. DAMN!

Renee............... WHERE ARE YOU???????

2009-10-27T21:39:00.000+08:00

=(

Sigh....

<3

2009-10-20T01:07:00.000+08:00

1 Year ANNIVERSARY!!!

2009-10-19T23:02:00.002+08:00

Hi Renee

Happy 1st Year Anniversary!!

Do know that i'm really happy with you by my side!

I <3 You!

Yours,
Marc-Wan
=)

My Great Depression

2009-09-13T01:36:00.002+08:00

The Wall Street crash was in 1929, also known as the Famous Great Depression. My Great depression is here. I'm just waiting for monday to come.. Well, hopefully, things won't be as bad as i'm expecting.. I'm prepared for the worst, not totally though.

06 Sept 2009

2009-09-10T00:29:00.000+08:00

Finally, the time has come. Time to move house! After many months of waiting, we finally shifted to our apartment. Very nice place. People who came here all loved the balcony. Haha. Anyway, I'll update the blog soon. Busy!!!

September

2009-08-30T12:58:00.000+08:00

September is coming!!!

2009-08-26T01:01:00.002+08:00

Sometimes, we just wish something can happen. In such circumstances, someone will get hurt, angry or misunderstood. On the other hand, all parties will benefit and stay happy. Sometimes, we want to alter things but we can't because it's not within our control.

Bruno

2009-08-18T00:57:00.003+08:00

EXAMS ARE FINALLY OVER!! WHOO! Had a great day today. Played Call of Duty alone at parklane! Can you believe it? Lol. I was waiting for Renee to be done with School la. Nothing to do so i decided to play lan. Haven't played that game in ages. I even forgot the controls and i got owned! Met Mohsin and Shafri for dinner at Victory.

Queer, Dyke, Fag, Gay, Shit. That is what Bruno is. Watched the sneak preview today. It is a very disturbing show, especially if you are anti gay. Anyway, it was an awesome movie. Laughed till i almost choked on my burp. Lol!

Camp tmr. Got medical appt. I love Medical appointments. Allow me to leave that shit hole early! 5 MORE MONTHS TO GO!! Seems really short but i tell you, it feels really long. The Shorter the time left, the longer you will feel. Damn!

Shifting soon. Renovations are on the way! Like finally!

OK LA!! GTG!Had an Awesome day with her ;)

Exams and headaches!

2009-08-05T00:21:00.003+08:00

HERE'S A REMEDY FOR HEADACHES

About 10 mins ago, i saw a police man chasing a thug down. The dude just got handcuffed. Wonder why. Hmm.. How cool is it eh. If only my army life can be this exciting.

Today was alright. I'm struggling with my revision. Getting a headache everyday. Can't wait for the exams to be over. She's getting busier nowadays. My time with her is like so much more precious now. Haha.. Tmr is Wednesday, Mid-week. Exam is less than a week away. Hope i am prepared.

HELLO!

2009-08-04T20:04:00.000+08:00

Exams are coming! It's just NEXT WEEK!! WTHECK!

Renee and Renee and Renee

2009-07-29T23:46:00.004+08:00

THIS IS THE BEAUTIFUL, GORGEOUS AND WONDERFUL GIRL WHO COMPLETES MY LIFE!!!

I've been wanting to share my joy with you readers. Well, i don't have a kid of course. I'm not getting married either. Hmm. Well, It's about this really wonderful girl whom i met last year. Her name is Renee =)

Renee, she is of course a girl, who works at SDT, SOTA and at SOD. She's going to school next month. At La Selle. I am indeed happy and excited for her. Hmm.. She is in her own way special, malay people says, Istimewa. She cares, loves and gets angry in her own way. Of course, we do not want to see her getting mad. When she's mad, i'm really very scared. Haha. But of course, when she's smiling and laughing away, it makes me really happy.

She loves chicken breast, lots of cilli, orange juice with her mac breakfast, my cooking?? LOL! SHE LOVES ME that's the MOST IMPORTANT thing. LOL!! Hmm...

She is disgusting in her own ways which i surely won't mention. She has a really unique smile and laughter and voice. After a long day at work, hearing her voice just makes me feel..... Relaxed and chilled.

I love you Renee :)

*I CANT SAY EVERYTHING ABOUT HER!! LATER UR PREY AFTER HER!! BUT SORRY, SHE's TAKEN!! HEHEHEH!!

Trapped in a Jam

2009-07-29T02:20:00.003+08:00

Renee

2009-07-29T01:44:00.002+08:00

My most beloved

2 out of the many videos

2009-07-28T15:21:00.003+08:00

Have a good laugh!

Starring:
Mohsin - The King
Shafri - The King's Son
Manoh - Reporter
Me - The King's helper

travelling buddies

2009-07-28T15:18:00.000+08:00

2009-07-25T02:14:00.002+08:00

MORE TO COME TMR!

Pictures!

2009-07-25T01:29:00.001+08:00

Pictures are on facebook. Currently, there's some problem going on with blogger so i can't exactly post any pics!

Day 1 M'sia Trip

2009-07-25T01:28:00.001+08:00

0000hrs
Fled for our maiden voyage towards Penang at 0000hrs. The journey lasted 3hrs from the 2nd link @ Tuas. Used to be able to reach KL in 2hrs and 15 mins. But i was driving a different car then. The type of car does matter!! Currently, we're at Macdonalds having our mini break fast. It's 0340 hrs in the early morning of 24th. In probably 30mins, we'll be heading towards Penang. Trip has been excellent. More to Come..

0745hrs

FINALLY! Penang! We arrived to our destination at 0745hrs. Snap some shots on the way. We're officially 720km away from home. Checked into our hotel at 0900hrs. Roaming around the streets looking for an hotel was a bitch. Grand Copthorne Orchid at Bukit Ferringi. Best thing is, we're in a junior suite overlooking the sea!! Very cheap as well!! RM270 a night NETT! Heading out in awhile.. hopefully!

Had lunch in the afternoon at Nandos in Guerny Plaza. It was alright. Apparently, most shops opens only in the evening. Night markets etc. Came back to take a nap. We hardly got any sleep. on the way up North. Manage to get about 2 hrs. After getting up from my nap. Mohsin and Shafri started theirs. Got a little bored so i decided to explore Penang on my own. Manage to find some places BUT i got lost on the way back. A really bad flu hit me. Bad weather + Flu + gotten lost = SHIT! I really felt like crap. During the fiasco, almost met with 2 accidents. Manage to find my way back to the hotel after turning for about an hour. Although Penang might be just 1/2 the size of Singapore, getting lost makes it seem like it's 2 times bigger than Singapore. Back at the hotel, the dudes are all still asleep!! WAKING THEM UP NOW!!! Probably heading for some nasi kandar and night market visitation after this.

Just before Evening came.

We wanted to rent a motorcycle initially instead of drving around. When we finally came to our decision it was 1300 plus already, nearing 1400hrs. A taxi driver took us to the place of rental and when we reached, it was 1405 hrs. The people has just stepped out awhile ago for their afternoon prayers. Cut to the chase, we didnt rent the bike as it was too dangerous and i offended the cabby! Lol!! Damn funny!

Evening

Best part of the day.. The thing which we wanted to eat for a really long time. NASI KANDAR! Penang is known for it's food and Nasi Kandar is one of them. In fact, Penang is the founding state of Nasi Kandar. Ooo..

Travelled around looking for the supposedly famous nasi kandar and we found it after travelling a good 45 mins. Jalan Penang. Batu Ferringi Night Market was our next stop. Bought quite abit of stuffs there.

Back at the hotel now. By the poolside blogging.

Stay tune for Day 2! Tmr.. Over and out

Ballet under The Stars!

2009-07-20T03:04:00.003+08:00

Went for Ballet under The Stars yesterday together with Renee, Mohsin and Darsh. It is a fabulous event. So many people so we ended up sitting and picnic-ing right behind under a tree. We re-named the event, 'Ballet Under the Trees' also known as BUTT. LOL!
Had a lot of fun there.

We were hanging out behind the stage during the interval and we caught this couple making out in the middle of a really huge grass patch. They were smooching and smooching. It was as though there weren't anybody around them. I was playing around with XLR camera and so i decided to snap some shots. Guess what!? The couple came up to me and asked to check the last few shots i took!! They thought i was snapping their monkey asses making out!! Oh my Gosh! We all got a shock!

Event ended at about 940 and we made our way to haji lane to chill out and headed back home an hr later at 11.

Below here are the pictures we took with the XLR. Enjoy, peace out!

2009-07-08T00:46:00.000+08:00

Goodbye Michael Jackson, RIP. I'm watching ur funeral by the way.. Peace brother

2009-07-06T01:46:00.002+08:00

4-4 the match ended in a draw.

Had 1 of the best 11 aside match today. As much as it's the best, i was quite disappointed with myself. Physical aspect wise. After getting the torn ligament 2 years back, i can't sprint like i used to. Not as fast as i was.

Watched Transformers today. Isn't that good. Action was awesome though. Enjoyed the movie ;)

Ah... Camp tmr. It's the beginning of the week. Hope it will be a great week for everyone..

R.I.P Michael Jackson

2009-06-27T00:06:00.002+08:00

Woke up today and saw 2 text msges. MICHAEL JACKSON'S DIED!

SO...

To my all time favourite artiste, M.J, R.I.P

Grew up listening to M.J. Loved his songs although he's a pedophile and maybe, a fag. But anyway, doesn't matter. His songs are all great.

Here's a great song from the movie 'Free Willy'

Another day... Gone

2009-06-25T23:42:00.003+08:00

This is my 'brother', Paul. Great buddy of mine. He just got enlisted into the Army. Miss him. I sent him a text msg on the day of the enlistment. Told him to not be the next serviceman to appear on the front page.. Damn evil!!

Hi all

Had an alright day today. Attended a course down at OETI @ Ayer Rajah Camp. All of us cheated in the exam. To the extent of me going over to my friend's terminal to help him do the exam. Another friend helped me did the MCQ questions. Well, all of us scored a 100% and the best thing is this, during the lecture, NONE of us were listening. In fact, we were just sleeping behind and when we're not sleeping, we were gossiping! Lol.. It was pretty fun.

Had an early fall out. Reached home and i immediately fell asleep. Went for Prayer Meeting. PLayed the acoustic guit for the meeting.

Dad's car couldn't start today. Cabbed down to haji lane to help him out. Realised that i couldn't help to do anything. The battery was screwed. Mechanic came only an hour later! But he was a really nice chap.

Hi ALL!

2009-06-24T23:37:00.002+08:00

Ok.. Back..

Exams are coming up. School isn't exactly going that well for me. Failed my Econs paper! Got to go for a RE-Exam and THAT SUCKS! If i fail the re exam, that is it, another RE will come up. RE-MODULE!! Lol. Project's bad man. 30/100?!! WTH! My part got an A but the rest all F! Shit man. Exams coming up in August. With the re-exam, i got 3 papers to sit for. Principles of Marketing, Human Resource Management and Principles of Economics.

DAMN IT!!

Life's good (LG).

First up, :)

Secondly, ORD-ing in 6 months! Whoo!!

Thirdly, Moving house!!

Starting to read William Shakespeare stuffs. Ooo.. Complex..

Work's still alright. Then again, how great can it be??? The Army Suck.. 6 more months so E.N.D.U.R.E!

ok. Tmr's a thursday. Got a course to attend at Ayer Rajah Camp. And Friday i'm in LOVE :)

Everyone say.... Oooooooooooooooooo.. LOL!

OK. PEACE OUT Chickas and what do you call a guy chick??? (a Cock?) HAhahahha! Bye!

My Pineapple Hairdo..

2009-06-15T01:10:00.002+08:00

Here. Just cut my hair. Had to do it. RSM's order. Didn't go to peter's to cut. He was closing when i called to book for an appointment. Went to Hair Journal instead. Had my hair cut by the director. Gave him instructions on how to cut and.. HERE.. I look like a pineapple now.. zzz..

Still looks pretty alright though.. Just... Er.. Not that use to it.. Haha..

Pissed off

2009-06-14T00:31:00.002+08:00

I'm really ticked off.. at a particular church mate.. I can't believe you said that.. Damn it.. I was like wtf?! (when u said it to me)

The Heart of The Matter..

2009-05-20T01:38:00.001+08:00

What shd i blog abt?

2009-05-12T00:46:00.001+08:00

Writer's block. Don't know what i should blog about. So many things in my head but i don't wanna blog about them. Any suggestions?

The Very 1st Centless Video!

2009-05-08T00:32:00.001+08:00

'Our Humble Beginning'

Who i am hates who i've been cover..

2009-05-08T00:07:00.002+08:00

Who i am hates who i've been cover by The Centless Team.

Manager: Joel 'Boomer' Qin
Drummer: Daryl
Keyboardist: Matthew
Lead Guitar: Marc
Rhythm Guitar: Jonavan
Bassist: Lioness (how to spell ur name ah?)
Singers: Jon Wee and Joshua

Relationships and it's complexity

2009-05-05T15:18:00.001+08:00

It all actually depends on individual. The extent of treating the right way varies. To 1, it may be just being there as much as possible, time spent. Some it may be showering with gifts and compliments.

Well, have we ever asked ourselves what the partner thinks when we do that? Have we asked ourselves what the expectations of our partner are? For myself, i feel that we have to know and understand what our partner wants in a relationship. What they are seeking after. If we don't do that, well, chances are the relationship will bound to fail. Some might disagree of course. But really, if both work towards a common goal and have a common understanding then things will really be sweet and work out.

Sometimes, things which we do will pull our partner down. We might not be able to see it till 1 day, he or she gets really frustrated. Well, it happened to me. All these while, things may look really good on the outside for most of us but actually, deep inside, we are actually slowly destroying something and most of the time, we aren't aware of it. It maybe too late if 1 day, he or she voices out and wants to reconsider the relationship. The saying goes, it takes 2 hands to clap. Personally, i think nothing is too late. If both party truely loves each other, i am sure that both will want to give the relationship a chance and things will change for sure.

I learn that we cannot change someone else. We can only change ourself. If we change, then our partner will change.

Laying down priorities is also an important factor. Our world cannot just revolve around our partner and us. During the initial stage maybe but after awhile, it is good to sit down and talk about laying down the priorities. Each of us have our own friends, family and things to do. There is more to that then just both us and our partners. Time management also plays an important part. We have to manage our time proper making sure our family have time with us as well.

Trust is also very essential. Without the element of trust, we will just be out worrying about what our partner's doing and it does not do us any good at all. Sometimes, we think too much. So much so that we just jump into an assumption and we tend to go crazy although nothing happened. Trust is built over a long period of time. And Trust is about having faith. Trust is hard to gain but very easily lost. Trust is putting your confidence in someone forming a bond with him or her and knowing that you can rely on them for anything.

Independence. Well, we have to learn to be independent. At times, if our partner really cannot be here for us, and there's nothing we can do about it. We have to be strong and emotionally stable. Being independent is very important. It shows a certain form of maturity and stability. Having said that, we cannot make decisions base on our emotions. It certainly not a good thing to do.

So...

Here are a list of priorities for myself

!) God and my ministry
2) Family
3) Studies
4) The girl of my life
5) Friends

I also learn that your partner should be supportive of what you do and respect your priorities. We ourselves also have to do the same for our partner. It is the support of my partner which drives me. Apart from all these priorities, we must never neglect the welfare of our partner. I believe that no matter how busy we are, if our partner needs us, we must be there. We still have to show care and concern to them letting them know that apart from the busy schedule we have, we are still there for them. And at the end of the day, after a very hectic day at work or school, we will want to come home to our man or lady, just spending time with them in our own ways. That, will complete the day or that will be the remedy for a busy day or a bad day. I am sure, seeing your partner smile will make your day.

I pray for a blissful relationship to those who reads my blog and all the best to you and your partner :) Cheers!

Our Love, Don't throw it all away

2009-05-05T00:50:00.002+08:00

He looks like the dude from blades of glory. Lol. Anyway, here's Andy Gibb with 'Don't throw away our love'. Really nice and meaningful song.

Lyrics:

Maybe I don't wanna know the reason why,
But lately you don't talk to me,
And darling I can't see me in your eyes.

I hold you near, but you're so far away,
But let your love flow back to me
How can you leave and let this feeling die.

You alone,
you alone know the living thing that keeps me alive.
And tomorrow if I'm here without your love,
You know I can't survive.
Only my love, only my love can raise you high
above it all.

Don't throw it all away, our love, our love.
Don't throw it all away, our love.
Don't throw it all away, our love, our love.
Don't throw it all away, our love.

We can take the darkness and make it full of light.
But let your love flow back to me.
How can you leave and let this feeling die?
Happy room,
This happy room would be a lonely place
When you are gone,
And I won't even have your shoulder for the crying on.
No other love, no other woman's love could be as true.
I'm begging you.

Don't throw it all away, our love, our love.
Don't throw it all away, our love.
Don't throw it all away, our love, our love.
Don't throw it all away, our love.

Okay. A women is really hard to understand. Let me just put it this way, a guy has alot to learn to really understand a lady.

Finally

2009-05-02T02:57:00.002+08:00

My driving... Not. Someone knocked into me.

How's everyone today? Good i hope. Yesterday and today was really awesome. :)

Woke up today, it was 1040am. It's coming 3am now. It doesn't feels like it's 3am in the morning. Damn.

Tmr is Saturday. It's May finally. What's in for me for this month. Football matches, going to range to fire my bitch, more physios and of course, many many good times with mon amour. Okok.

Finally, things took a turn. For the better of course

The Snail

2009-04-29T01:01:00.001+08:00

This is Something which my friends are Very capable of doing...

The Price for Being Nice

2009-04-28T01:09:00.001+08:00

3 Men were waiting to go to heaven. St Peter was at the gate and said, "However good you were to your wife that is the vehicle you will get in heaven".

The first guy comes up to the gate and says, "I never, ever cheated on my wife and I love her". So St. Peter gives him a Rolls Royce.

The next man comes up and says, "I cheated on my wife a little but I stilll love her." He gets a mustang and drives off into heaven.

The next guy came up and said, "I cheated on my wife alot". He gets a scooter.

Next day the guy that got the scooter was riding along and he saw the guy who owned the Rolls Royce crying.

He asked, "Why are you crying you have such a nice car?!" and the man sobbed, "My wife just went by on roller skates".

Take My Hand and Walk

2009-04-28T00:43:00.001+08:00

I know there are times
your dreams turn to dust
you wonder as you cry
why it has to hurt so much
give Me all your sadness
someday you will know the reason wy
with a child-like heart
simply put your trust in Me

Take My hand and walk where I lead
keep your eyes on Me alone
don't you say why were the old days better
just because you're scared of the unknown
take My hand and walk
Don't live in the past
cause yesterday's gone
wishing memories would last
you're afraid to carry on
you don't know what's comin'
but you know the one who holds tomorrow
I will be your guide
take you through the night
if you keep your eyes on Me
Take my hand and walk where I lead
Keep your eyes on me alone
don't you say why were the old days better
just because you're afraid of the unknown
take my hand and walk where I lead
you will never be alone
faith is to be sure of what you hope for
and the evidence of things unseen
so take my hand and walk
Just like a child
holdings daddy's hand
don't let go of mine
you know you can't stand
on your own

Fusball Table

2009-04-26T01:19:00.002+08:00

Watched 2 movies today back to back. Fri the 13th and 17 Again. Lol! Crazy...

The International

2009-04-25T04:44:00.005+08:00

Just got home. It's abt 4 plus am in the morning. Was an okay day today. Did what i had to. Met Boon, MK, Wee Lee, and Pt at Mad Jacks.

Here are 2 videos. This is what we do when we are bored. This is just... The Homies (Not the full strength) Movie started at 2am.

Enjoy, it's pretty lame and dumb, but we just wanna have fun :)

Like only a woman can

2009-04-24T03:40:00.002+08:00

The Quartz

2009-04-24T01:55:00.004+08:00

Some news, we're moving out of Circuit Rd! Whoo! Something really exciting to look forward to! We have been staying here since 2001. It has been a really long time. This move will be our 7th one. We will be moving to 'The Quartz' at Buangkok. Yea, Buangkok. Sounds really far eh. Well, it isn't. Initially, i thought it was. The North East Line is just next to the place. To town, it is only 16mins? To school, 20 mins. To church, 30mins. Only problem is to camp. I don't know how i am going to get there. I'll find my way. It has bus which takes you almost everywhere from there. So, it is very convenient. So far, the only bus i know is 43 which goes there. So here are some of the pics of the new place.

The balcony is like.. wah lao.. the stars are just right above ur damn head. The pic shows the balcony, Living room, Toliet, Some rooms and the secret garden. :) Enjoy!

Horseman

2009-04-23T16:54:00.002+08:00

OMGosh! PICS I FOUND!

2009-04-22T02:14:00.003+08:00

No. It's not a wig i'm wearing Damn it! :D

April News by Centsless Production

2009-04-22T02:05:00.000+08:00

This is good stuffs

Have a Good Laugh!

Pics from the Dary's Bday

2009-04-22T01:40:00.005+08:00

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:(

2009-04-22T01:13:00.002+08:00

Last Sat, we celebrated Daryl's 19th Birthday. He and i, we performed 'live' at timbre. Video is up on Youtube

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=grOMUuENWRQ

If you cant click on the link... DONT WORRY! Just search for
Daryl's Birthday Performance at Timbre

We all had a good time there. As usual, Jonavan, Leb, Jon Wee and Daryl asked where the 'Rain' was. Kept asking why isn't the 'Rain' there.

Today:

Met Peng Teck for dinner after gyming at The Cathay. Wee Lee joined up with us awhile later and Paul came as well. Couldnt decide what to do so we headed to the Lan shop to play Call of Duty: World at War. Wait.. Or is it War at World? Anyway, not Left 4 Dead. Sick of that game. Played 3hrs straight til 12plus. All of us were giddy at the end of the game. Motion Sickness.

Everyone goes through hard times in Life. I'm not being all-righteous, all-knowing and shit here. But base on what i know, sometimes, shit is thrown in our face. Depends on the angle, some straight in the face, some just fall on our heads. But whatever the situation maybe, who could we rely on? Well, from what pastor Aaron said, through tough times, it's,
1) What we do
2) How we give
3) Who we know

Je passe par vraiment une difficulté ici après ce que j'ai vu aujourd'hui. Au moment même où j'ai pensé tout était de nouveau à la normale, il s'est produit encore une fois. Pourquoi ? Pourquoi revenu en premier lieu ? Avez-vous vu ce. Je crois que si vous prenez une décision sur revenir, et même avant de prendre cette très décision, vous devrais avoir pour penser par des substances. Oui, ceci pourrait être inévitable. Mais, des choses peuvent être parlées à travers. Au moment même où je t'ai fait confiance de nouveau, cette chose se produisent. Pourquoi ? Tant de questions que j'ai.
Mais u a-t-il pu leur répondre ? Pourquoi continuez-vous à exécuter loin ? S'il n'est pas moi puis quel est le problème ? Comment est-ce que je vous soumets à une contrainte ? Parfois, je me demande vraiment vraiment ce que vous pensez et. Je t'aime tellement que j'abandonne beaucoup pour vous et je suis très heureux que je l'aie fait. Cher. Partagez juste vos pensées avec moi comme comment je fais. Communiquez avec moi, souriez davantage. Vous regardez si beau

....

2009-04-21T02:41:00.005+08:00

tout que je veux doit être aimé et amour en échange. est-ce qu'u vraiment m'apprécient et aiment ?

aimez-moi, c'est tout que je te demande

Bye..

2009-04-17T01:00:00.003+08:00

wont be blogging till further notice

Argh..!!

2009-04-13T03:12:00.004+08:00

She... A really wonderful girl, amazing.

3.12am.. Just had dinner. Double cheeseburger meal.. Bit my 2nd finger while eating the fries. Damn. Felt like the finger was going to come off. Lol. Getting really fat from eating Rubbish. Argh. Must be from all the studying. Econs Exams tmr. Prepared for it. But, no confidence. Dont really feel prepared at all.

Going back to study. Good Morning to All! :):)

April Fools

2009-04-02T01:24:00.003+08:00

Hi all.. How did your pranks go today? I didn't do much pranks which is unlike me. Pulled a prank on her though. It was totally nasty but i failed to pull it through. She just went.. APRIL FOOLS!! I couldn't help but laugh.

Hmm.. Grown up already? I don't think so. Like what i told a friend in a Text MSG, I will grow up, but Marc will always be Marc. So please do not expect to much from me yea. Of course, i will change my way of doing things but some stuffs, but some will still be the same. :)

So i was speaking with Tony just awhile back, still am though. We were on the topic on dressing up and being who you are and not conforming to what's normal. Imagine this, 1 day, you take a stroll down Orchard Road or City Hall or wherever. You see, nowadays, youths just follow the trend in fashion, music and whatever. There are a very small percentage of people who dress to what they are and what do they get? Criticism, Gossips, what else? I don't know. They get scrutinize. Or get screwed. Lol. So anyway, Just do what you want to do. Be Yourself Man. Don't let the people around you bring you down. BE WHO YOU ARE AND SCREW THE PEOPLE AROUND YOU IF THEY SCREW YOU UP. BUT DON'T BE TOO EXTREME!! LOL.

Exams this fri. I am prepared but.. Dont FEEL prepared. Maybe it's just like that. Oh well.. :)

Night world.

PEACE OUT!

Happy Birthday!

2009-03-31T11:40:00.002+08:00

Happy Birthday to Me (28th March)
Happy Birthday to my cousin Alex (30th March)
Happy Birthday to my other cousin, Kelli (31st March)

And to 2 friends

Happy Birthday to you Jia Ying and Liz! Both on the 28th of March as well. :) Hope you guys had a blast during ur bdays!

all smiles

2009-03-27T00:40:00.001+08:00

:):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):):)

:) All smiles

2009-03-22T02:42:00.001+08:00

Had a great day. :) Met Mohsin and all. Attended a Malay 'Getai'. Was an eye opener. Hmm.. Had a great day la..

?

2009-03-21T02:58:00.001+08:00

¿yo queremos saber 1 cosa estimada, somos parte posterior juntos? El cuadro en su cartera me está afectando, muy gravemente. ¿Te amo tanto, eso que usted sabe a la derecha?

Haizz

2009-03-17T21:09:00.000+08:00

Yea et ainsi c'est un autre poteau en un autre langage. À la Côte Est hier la nuit était vraiment impressionnante. Mais je vraiment vraiment suis encore confondu. À ce qu'elle fait, l'image d'un autre type dans sa pochette, elle rencontrant lui et. Ainsi quel est prochain ? La question i veulent vraiment demander est. Néanmoins m'aimez-vous comme vous faisiez toujours ? Néanmoins voulez-vous être avec moi ? C'est un oui ou un no.

Pictures from La-Bouscade @ the Sail, Marina Bay

2009-03-14T05:01:00.002+08:00

Pictures from the Wine tasting session at the Sail @ marina bay

that's all

2009-03-13T01:38:00.000+08:00

I can only give you love that lasts forever,
And a promise to be near each time you call.
And the only heart I own
For you and you alone
That's all,
That's all...

I can only give you country walks in springtime
And a hand to hold when leaves begin to fall;
And a love whose burning light
Will warm the winter's night
That's all,
That's all.

There are those I am sure who have told you,
They would give you the world for a toy.
All I have are these arms to enfold you,
And a love time can never destroy.

If you're wondering what I'm asking in return, dear,
You'll be glad to know that my demands are small.
Say it's me that you'll adore,
For now and evermore
That's all,
That's all.

Dejabrew

2009-03-13T00:21:00.003+08:00

<--- Like Mohsin..

Today was ok. Woke up at 630am. When to shower. Came out and my left leg went numb. It couldn't move. So i was like WHAT THE FUCK!! I CANT FEEL MY LEG! I really said that. So my dad came and help me to my room. Took an MC for the day. Headed to the gym to work out at the Cathay. Cut my hair cause i got caught for having long hair! Ridiculous eh. Was invited my Lennard to attend Château La Bouscade Premium Wine Tasting @ The Sail, an exclusive wine tasting experience with members of the French Alumni and French Embassy. It was totally awesome. Met Jun Fai there. BMT mate. Someone who i havent seen in more than a year. Had a great time there. I sent her name in as well. But sadly, she couldnt come. It would be so much better if she was there. Made some new friends there. Forget what their names were anyway. LOL. Then after, met my daddy. Headed to the IT Fair @ suntec. Same o Same o. Chat with him. He agree to send me to Australia next year. Hope the plan goes well. Not confirm yet. Dont really wanna go, because... but on the other hand, i want to go. Just wanna get out of this place. Too much shit here already.. Fucked up shit.. oh well..

Word of the day: DEJABREW

Meaning: Much like deja vu dejabrew is when you start to remember things you did last night while drinking an excessive amount of beer.

Word Formation: I remember now standing on the bar stool pissing into my beer mug while laughing at anything and everything. Oh my God, dejabrew! I won't ever be able to face those people again.

ALright.. Out of here..

recording pictures

2009-03-12T22:38:00.006+08:00

a successful man

2009-03-12T13:40:00.001+08:00

behind every successful man is the lady of their life.

FUCK!

2009-03-10T00:29:00.005+08:00

Sometimes, when we just wanna get away from the problem, we just do things to distract ourselves. People always say, Do something which you like, do something to occupy urself. Yea, and we do that. Fucking running away from the problem man. That's me. Yea, note that i use the word Fuck? Why? Perhaps one of the most interesting words in the english language today, is the word fuck. Out of all the english words that begin with the letter 'f' ...fuck is the only word refered to as 'the f word... It's the one magical word. Just by its sound can describe pain, pleasure, hate and love. Fuck, as most words in the english language is derived from german ...the word fuieken, which means to strike. In english, fuck falls into many grammatical categories

Alright.. sorry.. i'm just super pissed right now.. it'll get better..

just another day

2009-03-05T22:12:00.002+08:00

Left camp really early today. Went to Paragon to gym. Had physio today. It was... TIRING! Got rather bad news on my knee. Haiz..

Stepped out of Paragon. Looked left, then right, then left again. I felt lost. Took a bus to City Hall, and board a train to queenstown. Didnt know how to go to Alexandra Hospital. I only remembered how when i alighted from the bus from Queenstown. 14 goes there from Orchard. Hmm... Met Mohsin for dinner. Headed to Little India. It was great. Indian food is absolutely... FANTASTIC..

Birthday's coming. Nothing has been planned. Nothing much rather. Got a rough idea already. Waiting for the rest of the homies.. Alright. On leave tmr.. Going to swim.. Maybe..

Brawl

2009-03-04T23:00:00.002+08:00

Haven't gotten into a fight ever since i left Secondary School, that's as far as i can remember. Yesterday, we had a game at the cage. Eugene Sim, Rufford, Freddy, Reez and myself were together as a team. A brawl broke out between Rufford and 2 other dudes. I was involve. Got hit in the lips but whatever. Was protecting a buddy. Rufford, took on 2 of them. He didnt emerge victorious though but it's good effort for a handicap match. Nice blow to the guy's neck man. Totally awesome shit there!

Yes it was childish and dumb to get into fight but whatever. There's always a kid living in every guy. The little asshole will only come out when it's an all dudes meetup. Trust me. See that all the time.

Just got back from School. Camp was bad. Reached camp at 1pm. Didnt step foot in my office at all today. Felt damn stressful. Life suck there. All my buddies were on MC or Medical Appointment off. Was spending most of my time in the canteen alone man. Totally shitty. Got off work at freaking 6pm! Fall out timing was 1730hrs. Pierce Ammo Depot (PAD), the unit i'm in has really freaking retards in there. F-Tards rather. They just dont want to fall out at 1730. It always drags till 1800 hrs. WTH MAN! Anyways........ Some people just got into my hit list. Better watch out dudes..

Hope tmr will be a better day.. :)

Bye!

Head over heels..

2009-03-04T00:31:00.002+08:00

I'm sitting down on my couch, scratching my head not because it's itchy. It's great really, you made my day again. But, what's really going on?

Oooo

2009-03-04T00:00:00.000+08:00

Kite flying

2009-03-03T02:40:00.000+08:00

Are we still going to fly kite?

:)

2009-03-03T02:09:00.002+08:00

What a day... What a day..

i'm sorry PT. I had to do what i had to do for a greater cause..

you made my day!

MC is over

2009-03-02T13:24:00.002+08:00

It's a Monday today. Last Day of my MC. Haven't gone to camp the whole of last week. The hospital gave me 3 days of MC and another doctor gave me 2 days. Wanted to start studying but i just couldn't. Project's done, finally.

As much as people outside are going through a crisis, i myself am also fighting one. Sometimes, it's just so hard to accept the fact that she's gone. As much as i want to do something about it, i can't.

Why are you ignoring me? You sound really confused when u text me that 3 friday nights back.

Oh man...

School today.. Got Practical 2 today as well. Tight tight tight...

Wonder what's next...

Record, record and more recording

2009-03-01T01:22:00.002+08:00

Today was a really long day for some of us. Fiming and recording the whole day. In the morning, there was a filming going on in church. I was involved. Started at 9 but i woke up at 9. Lol. We're doing up a Centless Production again, this time, an MTV. Song title is 'Who i am hates who i've been'. Song reminds me of ..... Anyways, Did some filming for the MTV. It ended at 12.30. Had to go for Music Ministry Cell Meeting at 1330. There was a meeting for some of us at 330pm. Had very little breaks in between. After that, we had a studio recording which starts at 5pm at Chapter 6 Production for the song recording which lasted till almost 9pm! We were just recording 1 song! It was mostly my fault. LOL. Hands were too cold so couldnt grab the neck of the guitar firmly = to alot of mistakes. LOL! Overall, everything was excellent. Good stuffs, quality and all. Free fooooood!! LOL! Straight after that, we went down to the airport to complete the recording for the day. Waited around for 1 and a 1/2 hrs for God knows why. Some of us were completely pissed off. Like me. Finally got down to filming which took ONLY TEN SECONDS!! BLOODY HELL.. *BREATHE IN!!!! ok, i'm alright. Breathe OUT!!!* :)

Just got back home, it's 1.30. Damn tired. Came back home really early in the morning. Like 4am? Was hanging out with my Malay Dudes on Fri. Watched Marley and Me and just chilled at Arab St. Always there la. Hmm. Have yet to catch the show watch, He's just not that into You. Still waiting.. for.... someone... you know who u are.. Hmm..

BYEE!! Got Recording tmr still.. Whoo! Havent done this in a long while. Will be at the Cage tmr from 4-6pm. Then.. FREEE....!!

2009-02-27T03:13:00.000+08:00

Last day of Emo-ing..

2009-02-27T03:09:00.001+08:00

I got the call today, I didn't wanna hear
But I knew that it would come
An old true friend of ours was talkin' on the phone
She said you found someone
And I thought of all the bad luck,
And the struggles we went through
And how I lost me and you lost you
What are these voices outside love's open door
Make us throw off our contentment
And beg for something more?

I'm learning to live without you now
But I miss you sometimes
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I knew, I'm learning again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

These times are so uncertain
There's a yearning undefined
...People filled with rage
We all need a little tenderness
How can love survive in such a graceless age
The trust and self-assurance that can lead to happiness
They're the very things we kill, I guess
Pride and competition cannot fill these empty arms
And the work I put between us,
Doesn't keep me warm

I'm learning to live without you now
But I miss you, Baby
The more I know, the less I understand
All the things I thought I figured out, I have to learn again
I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But everything changes
And my friends seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

There are people in your life who've come and gone
They let you down and hurt your pride
Better put it all behind you; life goes on
You keep carrin' that anger, it'll eat you inside

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
But my will gets weak
And my thoughts seem to scatter
But I think it's about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

I've been tryin' to get down to the Heart of the Matter
Because the flesh will get weak
And the ashes will scatter
So I'm thinkin' about forgiveness
Forgiveness
Even if, even if you don't love me anymore

hungry!

2009-02-25T02:46:00.001+08:00

so hungry right now... argh.. eating nutella and bread with milk..

my 4.02am post

2009-02-24T04:02:00.003+08:00

it's 4.02. Rufford just left my place. Played winning eleven and rainbow 6 las vegas. It's been quite awhile since i was on the PS3.

Well, as usual, i'm on MC. Had really bad lower back aches. My injury is not confirm till i do an X-ray or MRI scan. Doctor suspects a slip disc in the lower back. Sigh. Cant do sports again in time to come.

Everything seems messed up here. Wonder how she is doing. Really wish to speak with her. Worried, very. She was everything, she still is. She.....

where is she?

2009-02-23T06:53:00.000+08:00

hey... where are you?

Almost Here

2009-02-20T02:02:00.001+08:00

Did I hear you right
Cause I thought you said
Let's think it over

You have been my life
And I never planned
Growing old without you

Shadows bleeding through the light
Where a love once shined so bright
Came without a reason

Don't let go on us tonight
Love's not always black and white
Haven't I always loved you?

But when I need you
You're almost here
And I know that's
Not enough
But when I'm with you
I'm close to tears
Cause you're only almost here

I would change the world
If I had a chance
Oh won't you let me

Treat me like a child
Throw your arms around me
Please protect me

Bruised and battered by your words
Dazed and shattered how it hurts
Haven't I always loved you

But when I need you
You're almost here
And I know that's
Not enough
But when I'm with you
I'm close to tears
'Cause you're only almost here

Bruised and battered by your words
Dazed and shattered now it hurts
Haven't I always loved you

But when I need you, you're almost here
(Well I never knew how far behind I'd left you)
And when I hold you, you're almost here
(Well I'm sorry that I took our love for granted)
(Now I'm with you, I'm close to tears
Cause I know I'm almost here)
Only almost here

Almost Here by Brian McFadden & Delta Goodrem

SHIT!

2009-02-19T00:01:00.001+08:00

OH MY GOSH! Face off is playing tmr on Live and Loaded! DAMN!! Why did i quit the band?!! LOL! All the best guys! :D Rock on bitcheS!!

SUPPORT LOCAL MUSIC.

www.myspace.com/faceoffsgp

Another day without .....

2009-02-13T00:15:00.005+08:00

Woke up @ 0630 today. Went back to sleep subconsciously. I only realised that i'm asleep when Mark called me in the morning to ask about my where abouts. That was at 8am. Woke up again at 12. Went down to NUS to meet up with Matt for lunch before physio @ 3pm. Had my biodex test there. Finally, i got the green light to return to sports which i already went back to long ago. The physio said that my leg isnt still very good. I cant control my landing when i jump. Still very shaky. So i cant advance to the next level. Still in Knee class. Next physio is next thurs. Went home after that. I signed up for blues and rock guitar lessons at my friend's shop in Peninsula. Had lessons at 7pm. Picked up my jeans at Marina Square and then met PT at 845 for Naan and Mutton Masala. Went to arab street to meet Mohsin and his MI friends. Just got back home.

Will be church tmr. Got Valentine's day event. Valentine's day..... Haha... oh Well.. Going to hit the showers and my pillows in abit. Camp starts at 0745 and there's live run.. I'll run if i get up in time.. Getting fat from all the junk. Not really.. Weigh 65kg now.

Nobody is at home now. Mom's at her friend's place and wont be back for a week. Dad's mahjong-ing. Ron's in Sec 3 camp. Where's everyone?!

Stupid

2009-02-12T01:27:00.002+08:00

Went to school today after work. Took a Bus to Dover Staton and a train from there. I saw the train from a distance. I actually lifted my hands up and flag for it. It took me 2 seconds to realise that it's a train. Immediately, i sweep my hands through my hair. WHAT WAS I THINKING?! Lol. hmm. Went home after school. Walked home from Aljunied Station. OK. I shall stop here. Cannot type already.

random thoughts

2009-02-11T14:57:00.003+08:00

So, i had time to think about things today. As in, really think. Not the senseless brooding and whining about HER. Not going off to my friends feeling like shit and thinking stupid thoughts. Just thinking.

I guess in every circumstance, it's a learning experience for each person. This is one of those times. I've learnt that:

1) Humans are inherently selfish. It all just depends on the extent, and the circumstances. These are the things that affect our actions, or reactions.

2) Communication is important, because it is simple, clear and direct. People see things from their own perspectives all the time. We are all born different. How can we expect people to see things from our point of view, when they physically just can't? We can put ourselves in other people's shoes, and try from there. But at the end of it all, it won't be exactly what the other person is thinking, just thoughts based on assumptions. If it's correct, then good. But what are the chances of getting them correct consistently? so yeah.

3) Communication is also a 2 way thing.

4) Assumption doesn't get true facts, just what we think is going on, and who knows, we could be wrong. It's 50/50.

5) Pain is a big part of life. Everywhere we go, whatever we do, there will be pain in our lives. An itch is a pain. just a really mild one. I'm guessing that we simply have to take the pain, that way, we know how much we can withstand, and what our limits are.

6) Life can be tough at times. The most important thing is to stick it through. No matter what people say about us, it shouldn't matter. We know what's within us. When people give us opinions, we should take what they say, and see how we can best apply it in our own situations. Like before, everyone's experience is different.

7) There is no clear yardstick to maturity. People have different definitions of being mature. People are mature in different ways. It just depends on how we look at people, and what we are willing to accept of them.

Through all these random thoughts in my head, i realise that i've been bugging her alot. Giving her deadlines, hinting that i'm ready. Maybe she just isn't ready at all. Maybe she won't ever be. Who knows?
It seems like everything was about my agenda, my schedule. And honestly, it's hard. Waiting is one of the hardest things ever. It's so damn painful. But, in focusing on my own needs, my own pain, i've forgotten about others.

Maybe this is what i need. A lesson in patience, to try and think that there will always be someone out there who has a greater pain, and a greater need than me. I think, perhaps it's time to just focus on what's not hurting, and what i can do, not just for others but also myself as well.

By making myself a stronger person, i can start to be someone people can rely on, confide in and lean on. Someone they can trust. I'm guessing it doesn't have to start with a girlfriend, just my friends in general.

I think i can learn from all this, everything that has happened. Everyone has to start from somewhere, and i guess this is my starting point.

All i can ask from her is forgiveness, and nothing more. Neither should there be an expectation of more. Let's just leave it as that.

So Moving on....

I've decided to enrol in an MMA class with Bert. I think we both need it =)
been getting fat eating ice cream and junk food! It's $200 bucks a month, 3 sessions per week at Macpherson, and i'm really looking forward to it.
Camp still sucks(what's new?) but at least i have something to do, which is good.

There's a really great guy called jonathon in my camp, and he was playing the guitar today. Really really good. Quick fingers, good control and loves his music.

Well, time to get back to army stuff.

Peace out

wonder wonder wonder

2009-02-11T07:19:00.004+08:00

oh no. shoots.. it's 7.15. i just woke up. late!

wonder what she's doing. i'm really worried for her knee. everyday, scenes of she and i just keep replaying in my mind and it hurts. but it's alright. Sigh.. she has been.. wonderful.. i have not. Wonder how her heart is. probably nothing i say now will work. but............

Scratch - Kendall Payne

2009-02-11T01:24:00.002+08:00

I miss you...

It's a big girl world now
Full of big girl things
And everyday I wish I was small
I've been counting on nothing
But he keeps giving me his word
And I am tired of hearing myself speak
Do you get weary do you ever get weak?
How do you dream when you can?t fall asleep?

I've been wondering what you?re thinking
And if you like my dress tonight
Would you still say you love me?
Under this ordinary moon light?
I'm so afraid
Of what you?ll say

I'd like to know if you?d be open to starting all over from scratch.
I?d like to know if you?d be open to giving me a second chance.

I used to think I was special
And only I have proved me wrong
I thought I could change the world with a song
But I have ended up in India
Oh
With no map to guide me home
The strangest place I think I've ever been
And all this time
I thought that we were friends
My stubborn will is learning to bend

It's a big girl world now
Full of big girl things
And everyday I wish I was small

Tag Box

2009-02-10T23:52:00.001+08:00

Tag Box removed. As much as pple are hurt, i am as well.

Should i?

2009-02-10T18:46:00.004+08:00

I was on the way home today from camp. Thinking if things can really work out between the 2 of us again. Hmm. If we really work things out, my answer is yes. So. What i am going to do now is this. Renee. If you are reading this, I'm going to take a break for a month. The 2 of us rather. Let things dissolve and if u want to, we could do something about the relationship. Looking at those tags, i think they are rather nasty. But wth. I dont wanna let that affect me. Yea. I really wonder who some of them are. Sheesh.. I want to see you so bad.. Anyway, i deleted some post. Was suppose to delete them this afternoon. But i didnt get to use the computer. Reason why i want to delete these post is because.. I think it's not nice. Anyway, i hope to get calls the 3 o'clock calls again.. miss your calls

Renee

2009-02-08T11:49:00.003+08:00

This Past 3 and a 1/2 months has been the best time of my life. There's nothing more i could ask for than just you being here with mne. Every single day, i look forward to seeing you, making you laugh and just seeing you being happy. Doing that simply just makes my day. It seemed that God has carved a person perfectly for me. Remember that list i showed you at bedok jetty?

Things took a U-turn yesterday after they spoke and told me what was wrong with me and gave me that verdict which i never expected. I was wrecked.

Renee, i dont know what is in your mind, but i just want you to know 1 thing which is, i felt yesterday, it wasnt a decision which you came about making it on you own. I know you well enough. You can't tell someone how much you love the person, You cant tell yourself how much you love the person and the very next day, you cant say how much you need this person by you everyday, and the very next day you just say let's go our seperate ways. Now, i dont know how long it will take for you to get back to me. I dont know how long things will be this way. All i can do is uphold everything to God. I don't believe in fate alright. I think the whole idea about fate is really stupid. But i know that if God path a way, he will.

You know, i want to be here for you especially in a time like that when you are on crutches. I want to see you to bed every night which i use to do so. Watching you in crutches really really breaks my heart. Give me something i can do either than backing off. Even if it means just sending you food or running errands. Anything. Not being able to help you makes me feeeel like shit. Yup.

When we 1st got together. I went on my knees in my room and i thank God for sending you into my life. I know i am the most luckiest boy in the world.

Cathay, ECP, Parkway, Starbucks, Coffee Bean, Star Gazing in your balcony, 'Saving all my love for you', watching Dvd in the back of the car............ the list goes on and on and on. I will miss doing that for sure and probably you will.

There is so much i want to tell you. There's so much i want you to know.

Renee, i'm waiting for the day. At your own pace and time, come back.

My biggest regret is to call for a time out at the wrong time. Ashley is right, sometimes i just dont think. I do stupid stuffs. I hate myself for doing this. Sigh. All i ask is for 1 chance to turn things around. I cant communicate with you through any means i know. Blogging is writting down all my thoughts. If you are reading this, do think of how things will be like if you started confiding in me first, telling me what you were not happy about, things which upsets you. I know things i say might make you feel that i'm egoistic and all but did you not know that if you tell me something about me which pleases or doesnt pleases you, i will listen and change? I am very sure things will not end up like that. In a way dear, i really feel cheated. Yea. But to hell with that.

When you say you Love me, i know you mean it. But why is it so hard to tell me what's wrong. This is really confusing for me. You love me so much but you dont want to tell me at least something.
Eg. Marc, i think you are abit egoistic, MArc i thought the guitar was for me? SHARE $ FOR A GUITAR?! YOU OUT OF YOUR MIND?!
You love me so much to let me go.

And sorry about this week. I realised that i the time out thing wasn't a good idea. I know i persist tooooo much. Everything was all about me and i didnt think for you much. I am sorry. That's another regret i had which is to keep looking for you.

Will i have another 3.30am call? Will i be able to do things with you? Will i have a second chance which i really think i deserve? I love you so much, i'll just do what i have to do now, which is to backoff. I love you and i know that's what you want for the time being so i'll do that. Remember, i'm always here, ALWAYS. If you have got anything, i mean really ANYTHING, i hope i'm the 1st one you will contact.

Like i always assure and tell you, You mean the world to me, i am so damn honoured to be with you, You have every reason to smile cause you got me. You completed me. Hope you still love me. Cause you damn well know that i do and that i am waiting.. Patiently, tho it's hard, i'll be fine. Hopefully..

STay tune for more post.

trapped outside

2009-02-05T01:57:00.003+08:00

I got locked out of my house yet again. Trying to find a way in. I manage to get onto the wireless.

ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

why is there tears again?

Day 4

2009-02-05T01:04:00.002+08:00

It's been 4 days? coming four. i've been desperate. Really desperate. Dudes, what will you do if you were me? No communications for 4 days!

Office called today. I'm might get kick out of DIST. Hope my office shit will be better tmr. Anyway. Met Zabrina today. Needed help in my econs project. Went down to Renee's place earlier to put the laptop there. Needed her to watch the video i made. Really wondered if she did. Zab and i went to kallang leisure park. Did my econs PW at Starbucks. Realised she was at SOTA. Sent Zab back and i came back to Sota. Text her at 1755hrs to let her know that i was around. Got there, she didnt turn up. Waited till 1845hrs. Had to go to school. She didnt turn up. It was raining initially. Wonder how and why she could leave me there alone. Sigh. Anyway, i reached school at 1900hrs. Left during the break. I really couldnt concentrate on my work. I tried. Met mohsin at al azhar for food. I was really damn sad. Almost cried in front of him. But i didnt. Too crowded there. Never been so down in my life before. We had food.

Tmr will be day 4. I will not be contacting her. I wanna hang out with her like soooon. Really miss my girl. If only she knows how i am feeeling right now. If only she text or call me.

Oh no. Gtg. i'm sitting outside her neighbours house and there's a dog in there. House Number 19 is scary man.

Renee.... Sorry i contacted u. You know i had to. I'm waiting for you. I'm ready.

Dearie!

2009-02-03T21:07:00.002+08:00

I'm at the Airport right now. Out with Peng Teck. Went down to TP just now to pick him. Was at Tampines Central before that. Went to see a doctor at Raffles Medical Centre with Jacinta. Needed to talk to her about some stuffs. Bloody Doctor at Raffles said my illness isnt substantial enough to get an MC. Almost curse the living shit out of him.

Picked PT up then went to the doctor across TP. Doctor was really nice. Was a lady doctor. Told her my ligament and ankles are giving me alot of problems. Before i left, i told her my 'heart' is in pain. She thought i had some cardio problems. Then i said.

M: Doctor, i got issues of the heart.
Doc: Oh.. Girlfriend?
M: Yea, Just tell me. Should i go look for her? We took a time out
Doc: Time out? Why?
M: Just wanna see how much we need each other
Doc: Sweet eh? Hmm, Take it slow. Listen to Aunty. Go when you feel it's right
M: Thanks Doctor, Are u giving MC by the way?
Doc: (Laughs). You want 2 days? 1 to rest your leg, the other to rest your heart?
M: Haha. Why not. Thanks Doc, Appreciate it :)
Doc: I know how you feel Marc, I see that you really love her alot eh.

So, i'll be on MC tmr. Dear, if you are reading this, if you are going to Laguna tmr, count me in? I really would like to see you, I'm dying to rather. Hope you wanna see me too. I hope your knee is getting better. I prayed for your knee that Sat. Everyday in fact. Hmm. I miss you, everything of you. Tmr is a Wed. Argh!

Peace out readers. I miss her :(

365 days more!

2009-01-23T00:08:00.003+08:00

Hi all, It's been awhile. I'm 365 days away to freedom. minus today will be 364. Minus all the weekend and leave, cannot count already. LOL. Anyway, Things are really great between renee and myself. Cannot be more delighted. At her place now blogging. She's showering. I'm in a new office in camp. Got kicked out of the Human Resource office and got thrown into the Pierce Ammo Depot also known as PAD. It's a better place of course, just that there's too much duties to do. OK. gtg. she's here!!

How?

2009-01-06T02:26:00.001+08:00

I feel useless. Really. I cant even help you. I wanna be the best i cant. I'm like hopeless.. Sight.. How can i help?